Back yourself

I saw the sad news about John Lewis this week and the potential 11,000 redundancies.  John Lewis was my first corporate love.  As I wrote in my book, I became totally institutionalised working there as a Saturday lad hauling 40” TVs into the back of people’s fancy cars, on the shop floor every holiday and even joining its graduate training scheme after university – I wanted that career.  The different staff restaurants depending on your grade, the language, the military routines and standards.

It still features in my dreams.  Seriously.

I lasted about six months on the grad scheme before I decided I did not want that career.  Nor the retail lifestyle.  And definitely not the pay.  But John Lewis always has a special place in my heart.  I even took a holiday at the island it owns off the beautiful Dorset coast…right next to an onshore oil field bp operated (then).  Everything comes full circle.

Well, almost.

Because when I started working at John Lewis I decided I needed more from my job.  And I backed myself with a Masters that turned me into a management consultant.  No one at John Lewis really understood why I was leaving.  Except my high flying (also graduate trainee) boss who bashed her head on the desk when I told her what I was likely to earn within a year.

But going back to university hadn’t been my plan.  In fact it felt like a backward step, especially as I’d already taken a year out before university.  I felt like I was running out of time.  Or at least wasting it.

But of course it was a major investment in me.  And it transported my salary and career prospects.  And it was a lot of fun to be a student again.

I backed myself then.  And I backed myself again when I left my corporate job.

Up until then I’d been backing bp.  I’d backed my business unit in bp, I’d backed the company not having another disaster, backed my boss doing well and taking us with him.  In other words I was backing things that were outside of my control.

It’s one way to live of course.

But I suspect it had a lot to do with why my confidence wasn’t particularly high.

And also why it’s soared since I left.

Because when you go it alone you have to quieten that inner critic, the voice of self-doubt, the part that wants to lay low and unobserved – and instead you learn to say “I’m worth something”.

I’m valuable as ‘FirstName, Surname’.  Outside of the company, the team, the job title.

And once you back yourself, surprise surprise, other people start to too.

And they start choosing you when they could choose others.

And then they recommend you to people they know.

Today, I’ve released my latest podcast (here and here) with Kia Cannons.  She’s now an artist and coach, but spent more than ten years in “grey, dull” corporate job - actuary for goodness sake.  Until one day she backed herself.  With a £96 art course in her local community centre.

She said something that has stuck with me since recording – and maybe it always will:

“It's interesting the moment I went I am worthy of spending this £96 on something that interests me everything started to expand and I find that this is a theme in life. You've got to go first. You've got to say I want this and I'm taking this for me. And it feels really scary and uncertain and I could be spending this money on other people who depend on me who I love etc. But I'm going to do this thing for me. Maybe for the first time in my life.”

Whether it’s the universe, or more likely that a confident glow breeds confidence in others, it starts with you.

You need to back yourself first.

We’ve got miserable January out the way.  I personally hate February just as much because it tricks me into thinking spring is on its way when it’s still not.

But we’re well into the new year now.

No more January excuses.

It’s time to back yourself.

If you’re ready to back yourself – or need help finding the reasons – reply to this email and let’s get you moving forward.  Of if you know someone who needs help, point them my way – there’s this blog, the Instagram, a course and of course – the podcast on Spotify and YouTube. And you can book time with me at Calendly.